Heart's Adventure

What does it mean to live an intentional life? Is it about having goals, assuming we know what we really want? And we can ever be sure that our goals will bring us what we need since we can never imagine what will happen between now until then? I know people with some great intentions, i.e.: a client of mine is excited and focused on starting a new career, a friend is dedicated to become a published author, and my nephew is dreaming about college to become a mechanical engineer. While their future goals are clear, it seems to me that it’s their excitement, dedication, and ability to dream – being fully engaged in life – that makes their lives intentionally lived. Beyond that I think it’s the energy that pulls us towards a goal and living life in a more conscious way; it’s having an understanding of one’s values and strengths, and how to utilize them effectively to create a life on one’s own terms. Life may hold many surprises for us, and we may stumble at times, but as the captain of our ship it’s what we make of the journey, and not the destination, that makes all the difference.

When is it time to let go of things that keep us from moving forward in our lives? Perhaps it is a psychological pain, i.e.: anger, remorse, grief, or unhealthy relationships. It can also be a tangible things, real-estate, automobiles, recreational equipment or just items that we’ve collected over the years that now weigh us down. It’s not always easy; sometimes we get end up holding on to things out of fear, even unhealthy ways of being in the world, because they are so familiar; tangible items hold meaning for us, evoking memories, becoming symbols of status; they help define us and our world. How often do we take stock of the things that hold us back, the barriers that keep us from moving forward no matter how much we may dream of doing something different with our lives? How often are we pro-active with this process as opposed to being forced to let go by circumstance? Letting go is a process that can take time, but the first step is always finding greater clarity about where we want to be. If we can truly really get a sense of the world we want to create, we can better understand what we need to get there. Creating forward movement towards ones dreams can help us move away from things that weigh us down. What course have you set for your life’s journey?

As we go through our day to day routine, what do we hope to accomplish? How often do we sit down and get a clear idea of where we want to be and what we really want out of life? Whether we’re working to achieve a personal goal, gain a new skill or pursue a new career it’s important to ask the question, “Why”? – Where would we be if we met those goals, had those new skills, new job or promotion? Would we be happier, more peaceful, and more financially secure? If we can be clearer about where we want to be and why we want to be there, we can begin to tap in to our own internal resources and start to take action. We can plan all we want for success, but it is really having clarity of vision and understanding the meaning of our journey, that truly enables us to embark on our hearts adventure.

With the advent of Facebook, MySpace, and a wide variety of internet dating services, we are presented with more opportunities to network than ever before. After sifting through hundreds of online profiles, we may be encouraged by an occasional connection; but our internet search often leaves us feeling even more discouraged than before. A Pew Research Center Study from 2006, however, noted that only 3% of internet users who were married or in long-term relationships actually met on the internet. 38% met at work or in school and 34% met through family and friends. This suggests that we are more open to connect with others when we are engaged in heart felt pursuits, in our profession or with family and friends. Remember that finding that someone special is not about casting a wide net, it’s about following your hearts adventure, finding yourself, and opening up to that place of greatest potential to find someone to share your journey.

Whether it’s social pressure, boredom, or just plain loneliness, we can find ourselves in romantic situations that just don’t feel right. Have you ever gone on a date just to have something to do? Have you ever stayed together with someone just so you weren’t alone during the holidays or for a special occasion? When it comes to prospective romance, how often do we really listen to our heart and let it be our guide? When we go out with someone for the wrong reasons we may rationalize our actions with the old phrase, “You need to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince.” Deep down, however, we realize that there are other more healthy ways to fill our emptiness or find that someone special. Sure we need to risk for love, but first we need to love ourselves. This may be easier said than done, but when we stop chasing after our dreams and really begin to experience the present we can feel whole again. Stopping to experience the here and now may at times bring fear and anxiety; but it can also bring clarity and acceptance, putting us in a better place to attract the person who is right for us.